#20

NaoSouONight:Hey!
NaoSouONight:That man is a hero!
NaoSouONight:He died so he could power bomb Jesus and stop the rapture.
NaoSouONight:You laugh now, but did the
NaoSouONight:rapture happen?
NaoSouONight:No.    

#19

NaoSouONight:I know how to tell chinese, japanese, and korean apart.
NaoSouONight:Chinese is like those really crammed up and angry squiggles
NaoSouONight:Korean squiggles have more space for themselves and look like weird emoticons
NaoSouONight:And japanese is whatever isn't chinese or korean
NaoSouONight:I am smart. 

#18

NaoSouONight:Why you people hate coffee?
NaoSouONight:You don't sound like you like coffee
NaoSouONight:Fancy little shit aren't ya?
NaoSouONight:Isn't espresso the pure coffee one?
NaoSouONight:No milk no sugar?
NaoSouONight:That is how I like it too.
NaoSouONight:I call it coffee.     

#17

NaoSouONight:My grandpa drank the blood of his dead enemies.
NaoSouONight:And cachaça.
NaoSouONight:But it was mostly cachaça.
NaoSouONight:We still don't know what killed him.
NaoSouONight:Could have been the bullet, or maybe, MAYBE, it was all the cachaça that he drank until that one point, where his body could no longer take it. 
NaoSouONight:The bullet is the official reason, though. 

#16

NaoSouONight:Ok, you either called me an asshole or a pepperminty sweet schnapps.
NaoSouONight:If it is the first, ok. If it is the latter, I am horribly insulted.
NaoSouONight:I am not pepperminty.
NaoSouONight:Or sweet. Or a schnapp.

#15

NaoSouONight:Also, quickly, everyone. Destroy all carrots before it is too late.
NaoSouONight:There is no time to explain, trust me.
NaoSouONight:I am from one hour in the future.
NaoSouONight:Destroy the carrots, save the cheerleader.
NaoSouONight:Save the world.   

#14

NaoSouONight:I wore a suit all day every day.

NaoSouONight:It is like a uniform.

NaoSouONight:A uniform for awesome.

#13

NaoSouONight:I had a beta once.

NaoSouONight:He was one murderous dipshit.

NaoSouONight:You couldn't put any other fish in there with him.

NaoSouONight:Well, **** him.

NaoSouONight:To the toilet with him, I said.

NaoSouONight:I didn't buy a bowl to have one dumbass fish.

NaoSouONight:He can go be alone in the sewers.

#12

NaoSouONight:When I had socrates and I got off the bed in the middle of the night, he would be all like "Where are you going? Are you going for a walk? Are you going to go find out who is a good boy?"
 NaoSouONight:He got all agitated and neither of us could ever sleep again.
 NaoSouONight:I was all like "Dude, I am just gonna close the window"
 NaoSouONight:My dog was called Socrates.
 NaoSouONight:He went to a better place now.
 NaoSouONight:Don't be sad. My uncle has this one big farm.

NaoSouONight:Now he lives there and he can kill big animals and run in the field.

NaoSouONight:But I am sure he likes the part where he gets to kill things.

NaoSouONight:I purposedly made it sound like he died to mess with you.

NaoSouONight:Because messing with people is so much fun